thirty before im thirty.

last year while at baylor i saw on one of my friends bulletin boards a sign that said "thirty before im thirty"... come to find out the things on the sign are the thirty things she wants to try her best to do before she turns 30. i thought this was such a cool idea and over the past semester i have been writing down the things that i want to do before im 30.

so here they are in no particular order! let me know if there's something on the list that you want to do as well and we can do it together:)

1. run a half marathon

2. scrapbook

3. learn how to cook

4. go to Africa

5. read a book that i normally wouldn't want to read

6. sacrifice something for someone else

7. go skydiving

8. teach

9. learn

10. go to Europe

11. graduate college

12. get a "big girl" job in the crazy world of social work

13. tithe regularly

14. love well

15. actually give dating a try and if God willing get married

16. try new foods

17. blog regularly

18. own a horse

19. take a spontaneous roadtrip

20. fast

21. go cliff jumping

22. buy a car on my own

23. read through the whole bible

24. stretch myself outside of my comfort zone

25. watch friends change, grow, and fall in love

26. go back-packing

27. learn how to drive a stick-shift well (i just think it would be cool.. haha)

28. live in the country...horses, a barn, dogs.. the whole shebang

29. less anxiety

30. everyday fall more in love with Jesus and let my life show it

:)

Learning through receiving.

As I was reading a blog online the other night I found a post about grace. This caught my attention because I have been learning a lot about grace through the past year in my own life. The blogger stated that if she could write six words to describe her life right now it would be...

Learning grace through receiving while failing.

I get this, because this describes this season in my life perfectly as well. Because I fail, daily. My actions don't deserve, daily, but I receive, daily. Whether it is from the Lord, my family or my friends, I feel like I am constantly receiving grace.

And sometimes that makes me mad.

Last summer when I was serving as a Baby Ruth at Pine Cove, I learned something about myself that I had never known before. It is easy for me to offer grace, but close to impossible for me to accept it. It's a selfish thing, really. I had some sick reasoning going on in my head that involved me thinking if I accepted grace from others and even from Christ Himself, that I was less of a person. I would get mad (and sometimes still do) because that's not who I am, right? I get mad that I have to fail to learn and that the failing hurts really, really bad.

Check out this verse in second Corinthians where God speaks of His grace being sufficient. (MSG translation)

...I was given the gift of a handicap to keep me in constant touch with my limitations... At first I didn't think of it as a gift, and begged God to remove it. Three times I did that, and then He told me, My grace is enough; it's all you need. My strength comes into its own in your weakness. Once I heard that, I was glad to let it happen. I quit focusing on the handicap and began appreciating the gift. It was a case of Christ's strength moving in on my weakness. Now I take limitations in stride, and with good cheer, these limitations that cut me down to size—abuse, accidents, opposition, bad breaks. I just let Christ take over! And so the weaker I get, the stronger I become.

My handicaps?? Anxiety, worry, control, fear of failure, fear of not being heard, fear of fill-in-the-blank.

But I know that when these handicaps cause me to fail in this world, I am picked up by His grace and I receive and learn and am sent off to take another step. I am learning and trying to put myself aside and sometimes that involves accepting grace not only from God but from those living life with me as well.

Sometimes I don't get it. Sometimes my mind and head and thoughts take over. But I am learning through receiving, which I think is the only way, really.